No Mascara Days

I wrote this on Monday. 

November 13, 2017

   

When I stand before God at the end of my life, I would hope that I would not have a single bit of talent left and I could say, "I used everything that you gave me."

Emma Bombeck

I want to wear my life out in His service and for His glory.

David Brainerd

I have been thinking about these quotes for the past few months. I found them during the study I was doing in the Holy Spirit during the Empowered production. This week the Lord brought them back to my remembrance. I needed to hear them. To be reminded that a life well lived out for the glory of God, no matter how short that life is, is a life that deserves to be remembered and honored. That is what we all have been doing since Thursday afternoon.

 Wilson Brant lived out these two quotes. He lived with passion for the Lord Jesus Christ.  When he entered heaven last Thursday he had worn himself in service to the King of Kings. He used the talents and gifts that God had given him to bring glory and honor to the Prince of Peace. That was what he lived for. To bring glory to God. That was his mission. As a soldier for the Lord, he served well.

Now, don’t get me wrong, Wilson was far from perfect. None of us are. I know he struggled with sin. I have listened to people very close to Wilson talk about his struggles and how he fought to resist the temptation to sin. He never hid the fact that he was sinner, but he always pointed us back to the one who gives us victory over our sin. He pointed all of us to Christ.

Wilson would be the first one to say that it was nothing that he had done. All of the singing and acting was not from him. He always pointed it back to the Lord he served. He honored Christ in his life and now in his death. We all are grieving over losing this friend but when we honor and remember him we cannot help but give glory to Christ.

 The loss of Wilson has rocked the Spiritual Twist Production family. This is really the first loss that most of these kids have ever felt. This was their peer. Their friend. Someone they worked with and worshipped with and had fun with. It has shaken these kids and caused them to examine what kind of life they will be remembered for. It has made them realize that tomorrow is never promised. I have watched these kids hug and cry and break down and laugh and praise and worship God ever since we all found out that Wilson had passed on to heaven.

William especially has been hit hard. He loved Wilson and Wilson loved him. Wilson was proud of the man that William is becoming and he did not hesitate to tell him. I remember being backstage during Madrigal. That was our very first STP play. William played Mr. Potter. I was standing backstage with Wilson watching William perform his scene. He began his song and Wilson looked at me and said, “Did you know he could do that?” Though tears I said “no.” It was a special moment that solidified one of the gifts that God has given William. Wilson was there to witness that with me. I just remember him smiling and nodding his head.

After every STP performance that William has been in Wilson would seek out William and give him a big hug. Wilson’s hugs were legendary. Most every person who has shared about Wilson has mentioned his hugs. I am so thankful that I got the opportunity to get a Wilson hug on Monday. It was also my amazing privilege to be one of the select few parents to have performed a play with Wilson. Many kids can say that they performed with him, but the list of parents is few. I am so proud to have gotten to see this young man backstage worshipping and praying and leading.

That is why it was so important for William to be with his friends on Friday night. I woke up on Friday morning about 7 and had this overwhelming urge to drive to South Carolina and bring him home to see the last Three Musketeers performance. After a lot of discussion between my husband and I it was decided that Esther and I would drive and get him. We left at 8:45. I prayed the entire way that God would give our car wings. We wanted to be back in town for the start of the show at 7. We got to the school about 1:30. I saw William and could tell that he was barely hanging on. He told me that he did not want to talk about it or give me a hug. He just wanted to get his stuff and leave. He was in bad shape as he had not been able to grieve or process the loss at all. He was with complete strangers when he found out. We grabbed his bags and got in the car. Before we even made it out of the parking lot I witnessed my sweet, compassionate son break down sobbing like I have never seen him. We wept for a good long while before he calmed down enough to talk a little

We got to spend the 5 hour drive home grieving and processing and reminiscing and worshipping through song. It was a very special time. We arrived at the theater at 7:15. God truly gave our car wings. The Lord knew that William needed to be surrounded by his friends.

For anyone who got to see the Thursday or Friday performance of Three Musketeers it was truly an amazing experience. It became a time to come together and laugh and grieve and remember Wilson. I am so proud of the kids in the cast for continuing and honoring Wilson in doing so. After the play was over they spotlighted a stand with the necklace Wilson wore during the first two performances. That really was the last straw for William. There was silence for a few minutes and then almost like a collective sob from the entire audience. It was like it really hit people after the lights went down. William broke down and I felt helpless. Several of his friends came around him and just prayed for him and talked to him telling him that it was okay to cry. My heart was breaking as his sobs could be heard throughout the entire building.

We then all heard the most glorious sound. It sounded like an entire church choir singing. We all began to look around until we discovered that it was the cast and crew singing backstage. They were singing, “It Is Well.” The audience joined in. It was the most precious sound I have ever heard. It was hard to describe.

The rest of the evening was spent worshipping and fellowshipping and hugging and yes, crying. No one wanted to leave. We had to leave as Esther, William, and I had been so intent on getting to the building on time that we skipped dinner. We stopped at the Waffle House where we had sweet fellowship talking about life and death and STP and Wilson.

The next day was an informal memorial service for Wilson at the STP building. People shared stories about Wilson and we sang songs. We just came together to grieve and remember together. We worshipped the Lord and thanked him for the 26 years that Wilson walked on this earth. We claimed God’s goodness.

This whole event has caused me to reflect on a lot of things. It has caused me to be thankful.

Thankful for the 6 years I knew Wilson.

Thankful for the fact that I got to perform a play with him.

Thankful for that last hug and smile I got last Monday.

Thankful for the fact he was a good friend to William and a role model.

Thankful for the fact that he pointed others to Christ.

Thankful that he lived his life with such passion.

Thankful that he brought glory and honor to the name of Jesus.

I have been reflecting on the effect that this loss can have on the lives of the people that knew Wilson. Natalie has been praying for revival at STP. She has been led that this year is going to be the best year. Empowered was amazing and changed lives. We have all felt that God is moving in a mighty way here at STP. We know the Lord is preparing us for something. The loss of Wilson has just solidified for these kids what it means to live for Christ. They saw it in Wilson and now that he is gone it is making them think about the legacy that they are leaving. God is still working mightily at Spiritual Twist Productions. He is preparing us all for some mighty work.

I cannot wait to see what happens this year and in the lives of the people who were touched by Wilson Brant’s life. He pointed others to Christ, even in his death. And shouldn’t that be our goal? It is mine!