Transparent Tuesdays - A New Season of LIfe

The Sandwich Generation

I always heard this phrase growing up but never truly understood it until the last few years. I have 6 children living at home that I am still providing for. But I also have a mother and father who are dealing with major health issues and need my help more and more. I am helping them walk through the loss of siblings. Helping them navigate caretakers and doctors' appointments and repairing cars and house improvements. And yet still trying to launch my own children into their own lives.

I never thought in a week that I would be helping children do school, helping plan two weddings, and still have to help my mom deal with some tough decisions about my dad's care. It can be a huge weight on my mind, if I let it. It can also be a wonderful blessing. 

I have watched two of my children meet and get engaged to two of the loveliest young ladies. I could not imagine better helpers for them. I have watched another child find a job that he loves to do and is eager to go out and work every day. I have watched my children grow in their faith. I have also watched as my mom has taken care of my dad and loved him even on those days when he is not the most loving person. On the days when he seems to lose himself. In the moments when he is not the man that she married, and the dementia weighs heavy on him - and all of us.

Life is busy and we are walking through some new and unexpected things the past couple of years. One of the things it has done for me is draw me closer and closer to Christ. That is the only way that we have made it through. I still walk into my parents' house and see their Bibles open. They still attend church - as much as they can. I see my children reading their own Bibles and attending church - even if it not the church that I attend. 

Some days it seems impossible to imagine that in less than 5 years, Carl and I will have 8 adult children. That we are making plans for what we are going to do in our retirement. That after 30 years in the military, Carl has retired and in now working in a new civilian job. So many changes. And God has been good through every second. 

I have set Yahweh continually before me;
Because He is at my right hand, I will not be shaken.
9 Therefore my heart is glad and my glory rejoices;
My flesh also will dwell securely.
10 For You will not forsake my soul to Sheol;
You will not give Your Holy One over to see corruption.
11 You will make known to me the path of life;
In Your presence is fullness of joy;
In Your right hand there are pleasures forever
Psalm 16:8-11

I am trying to dwell on this chapter all this year and I am so glad that God led me to this passage. My mom always says that as Christians, we are either going through a trial, coming out of one, or getting ready to go into one. The older I get the more I find that she is very wise in saying this. It is so true. I have to set my eyes continually on the Lord or I will fall flat on my face. He is my joy. I need to remind myself daily that in His presence is where I find my strength and life. As I embark in this new season of new jobs, new relationships, new roles, I need to meet with God more and more and pray continually. To find my joy in Him and Him alone. 

The table at my parents 50th weeding anniversary